Thanksgiving 2010

Thanksgiving is such a special time of year for me.  

 Since I was a kid, it has always been a wonderful time full of fun, family and food.  But the events that have taken place in my life over the past couple of November's have renewed, reinforced, and intensified the meaning of Thanksgiving for me.

Two years ago, I was a foster Mom and I was experiencing parenthood for the very first time in my life.  We had two and a half wonderful months with baby "H" before he went back to his Mom - the day before Thanksgiving.

There were many, many tears, and so much sadness and grief that came after his departure.  I feared that Thanksgiving would be a day that would forever remind me of the pain of his leaving us.

The next year, two days before Thanksgiving, we were scheduled to go to court and adopt our son Ian, making him ours forever.  I thought that this was our chance to make Thanksgiving a happy time for us - a time to erase all of those feelings of grief and sadness from the year before. Unfortunately, that was not to be.  A few days before that could happen, we were notified of the appeal.  Again, I thought Thanksgiving would forever equal pain in our family.

But thankfully, it didn't turn out that way at all.  When I look back now to that Thanksgiving two years ago, I remember feeling such peace, love and happiness the day after "H" left our family.  Miraculously, it was such a happy day - a day when we were able to put aside our grief and just soak up the warm feelings of love from our family.

 Then came last year - last year, I was totally consumed with fear on Thanksgiving, and I honestly don't remember feeling much else.  All I could do was take deep breaths and pray that this wouldn't be the first and last Thanksgiving I would spend with my baby.

Thankfully,  through the grace of God, I can look back at it now and realize that everything turned out exactly the way it was always meant to.  We weren't meant to become a family for six more months, and I can see now why things happened the way they did.  For that, I am truly thankful!

These past two years have taught me so much.  One very important lesson being that no matter what life throws at me, I always have SO much to be grateful for.  So since then, I have made it a point to make Thanksgiving a time to take note of all of those things, and to really give thanks for all the miracles and blessings that fill my life.

So here are a few of the things I am most thankful for this year.
(Other than the first few, these are in no particular order)

1 - I can't start this list any other way than with my amazing hubby Mike.

I am so blessed to be his wife, and cannot imagine what my life would be like without him.  We have been through so much together, and through it all, we have just become stronger, better, and more in love.  He was made just for me, and I am so grateful that we found each other.  I am also grateful for the amazing father that he is and for the way he truly cherishes being Ian's Dad.

I am so proud of him for what he has accomplished this year, and he is definitely one of my biggest heroes!!

  

I love you Babe! 

2 - Next, my baby Ian.  Where do I even start?  I met this amazing little miracle last year, and meeting him changed me more than I ever could have imagined.  He claimed my heart as his own from that very first glance, and I have been hopelessly and utterly under his spell ever since!

But this is the year that I "officially" became his Mommy, and that will forever be one of my greatest and most cherished blessings.  

Words will always be insufficient to describe the feelings I have for my son.  Just as I know that Mike and I were meant to be together, I know that Ian was always meant to be my son.  He is the reason I was born.  I get tears in my eyes every time I recall how many miracles took place in order to make us a family.  He makes me laugh, cry, and swell with pride every single day.

I never take for granted what a blessing it is to have him in my life, and I am so extremely thankful to be this miraculous little one's Mommy.   

I love you my sweet baby!!!

3 - My Mom and Dad.

This year was a tough one for my Mom and Dad, and for our entire family as a whole.  My Mom told us she had breast cancer in February.  Then over the next eight months she endured two surgeries, six rounds of chemo and 60 radiation treatments.  My Dad took care of her and suffered right along side her.  Today, my Mama is cancer free and doing very well - I am SO thankful!!!

  My parents play such a big role in my life and I love them so much.  I am thankful that my Mom has made it past this trying and painful battle and come out on top.

I am so thankful that Ian will still have his Grandma and Grandpa around for a REALLY long, long time!!

4 - Being a stay at home Mom and having a husband who works really, really hard to help make that happen.  We both knew that when we finally did have children, that I wanted to be able to stay home to take care of them. So we both worked really hard to get things paid off and to be able to live on one income, and now that dream is coming true.  I have never loved a job more, and I am grateful every single day that I get to wake up to Ian instead of my alarm clock!!!

This is the job I was meant for!

 

5 - My beautiful home.

We have lived in a lot of places in the 10 years we have been married, and this home is by far the best place we have ever lived.  It is definitely a sanctuary for me. It is a warm, safe place where I always feel welcome and loved.  It is a place where I love to be, and I hate being away from for too long.   I am grateful for "the cloud bed" and for the comfortable haven it offered me during my recent recovery.

I am grateful that we were able to finish our basement at the end of last year, just in time to put up our Christmas tree and to have Ian's first Christmas down there.  I love our house!   I haven't always loved where I lived, so I am very grateful to have that now!!

6 - Good friends and neighbors.

Our neighbors are an extension of why I love living where I do.  We have the best neighbors, and I am so grateful for them and for the friendships we have built together.  These are some of the best friendships I have ever known, and I am so extremely thankful for this blessing in my life!

I am also grateful to have some wonderful friends, who don't live by me but are always there when I need them.  Some have known me since I was just a kid, others I have met along the way, and some I have only met through the blogging world - I hope you all know how much you mean to me!!

7 - Insurance.  Even though we definitely do not have the best insurance, and we have a pretty stinking high deductible, I cannot imagine going through what we have gone through this year without it!

8 - Good foster parents.

Since becoming one myself, I have truly come to appreciate what these amazingly selfless people are doing for some very sweet and wonderfully deserving kids.  I am humbled to walk among them, and I hope that when I am done with this cherished calling, that I too will have made a difference in the lives of some very special people.

9 - Siblings.  Mike and I are starting to have the discussion of if and when to add more kids to our little family, and it makes me think of my own siblings and how important they are to me.

Even though I definitely didn't think this was cool as a teenager, I was lucky enough to be born right in the middle of my family, so I got to grow up with an older and younger sister and an older and younger brother.  They have each played a big part in shaping me into the person I am now, and I am thankful that God chose us to be a family.  I love you Jenny, Kelly, Jamie and David!
(And btw, I think it is time for a new picture!!!=)

10 - Ian's birth mother "E".  For her privacy, I won't post a picture of her here, but of course my list of the things I am most thankful for would not be complete without her.  I wouldn't be a mother without this sweet girl, and I will be indebted to her for the rest of my life.  I am grateful that she is turning her own life around and that we are able to enjoy having her in our lives.
We love you "E"!

11 - A stocked pantry and food storage.  A couple of weeks ago, we were driving home from a Sunday dinner at my parents house.  Ian had been too busy playing with his cousins to eat much, so on the way home, he finally realized that he was hungry.  For the last 15 minutes of the drive, Ian cried over and over, "Hot dog! Hot dog! Hot dog!"  Of course our reassuring him that he could have one as soon as we got home didn't help the situation right then!  I looked over at Mike and asked, "Could you imagine if your child were hungry and crying to you for food and you had none to give them?"  Right then and there I said a silent prayer of thanks that there was a hot dog waiting for us at home.  I am SO very grateful that I have enough food to feed my family, when I know there are many who do not have that luxury!!

12 - The little things.  I try so hard to appreciate the little blessings in my life, and believe me, there are many!  So here are a few remaining "little things" that I am thankful for every single day!


~I am so thankful for hugs and kisses and the two cute boys who give them to me every day.
~I am so grateful to finally hear someone call me "Mommy".
~I am so grateful for our soldiers and for the freedoms they fight every day to protect.
~I am so grateful to have enough money to go to lunch or a playdate with Ian once in awhile.
~I am grateful for naptime.
~I am grateful for babysitters.
~I am grateful for date nights.
~I am grateful for satellite TV.
~I am grateful for heating and air conditioning.
~I am grateful for two cars that work well and are still in great shape.
~I am grateful that we can afford gas to put in those cars.
~I am grateful for my health and that it is on an uphill swing right now.
~I am SO grateful for my doctor and for the kind, amazing, thoughtful and skilled surgeon that he is.

But most of all, I am grateful for love and family, and that I have been blessed enough to have found both!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!